It wasn’t a week into my first product manager role when my manager said it bluntly:

“We need to get you comfortable saying no to things.”

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Whether she felt that was necessary for any PM starting out…

…or she noticed that I would have a particularly difficult time with that part of the job…

...she was spot-on.

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As a PM in software, you’re the gatekeeper to engineering resources.

If someone wants something built, they have to find a PM that will squeeze them in.

So if you’re a ‘yes person’, your resulting roadmap becomes a splintered mosaic of other people’s priorities, which inevitably fails to move the needle against your own.

On the other hand, if a PM can hone the skills of discernment and discipline, they can keep their scope and output focused.

The result?

Compounding progress against a set strategy and faster, clearer results.

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As solo consultants, we’re subject to the same dynamic.

As warm inbounds and referrals come in, we’re inclined to say yes, even when the work doesn’t “fit” — misaligned scope, skills, terms, etc.

Early on, we can accept some variation in order to get some reps and early traction out on our own…

…but eventually, you start feeling the misalignment.

Either in resentment for the work itself…

Resentment for the client…

Or, resentment for ourselves for signing up for it.

All this goes away with a kind yet firm version of “no, thanks” early on.

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Have you taken on a client or project you later regretted?

Actually, when was the last time you said “No.”?

If only there were a mental model for navigating this in real-time…

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💡

-Wes